Paula? Paula, I know you're up there.

This is what I heard coming from my downstairs. So I went to investigate.

Me: Who's there?

Elliptical Machine: Over here, it's me E.

Me: Oh....hey..you!

Elliptical: I haven't seen you in a while. Are you avoiding me? I used to make your heart race.

Me: Me? No, no way. I've been busy.

Elliptical: Are you mad at me? Is there someone else?

Me: No, not at all. I was just thinking about you the other day.

Elliptical: It's TV isn't it?

Me: Ok, I have been seeing a lot of him lately. Sorry.

Elliptical: So is your ass!

Me: Excuse me?

Elliptical: You heard me biotch.

Me: That is no way to treat me, especially if you want me to get me all worked up again.

Elliptical: Ok, you're right. So are we on for tomorrow?

Me: Yeah, sure.